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Struggles: Weekend Edition

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Your Spiritual Fuel for November 18, 2013:

Today’s Gospel: Luke 18:35-43

As Jesus approached Jericho a blind man was sitting by the roadside begging, and hearing a crowd going by, he inquired what was happening. They told him, “Jesus of Nazareth is passing by.” He shouted, “Jesus, Son of David, have pity on me!” The people walking in front rebuked him, telling him to be silent, but he kept calling out all the more, “Son of David, have pity on me!” Then Jesus stopped and ordered that he be brought to him; and when he came near, Jesus asked him, “What do you want me to do for you?” He replied, “Lord, please let me see.” Jesus told him, “Have sight; your faith has saved you.” He immediately received his sight and followed him, giving glory to God. When they saw this, all the people gave praise to God.

 

Struggles: Weekend Edition

The past weekend was a very tough weekend for me.

First, my website got hijacked. I really don’t know how I got hacked. I thought all my passwords were secure. During the past weekend, I was just so worried about my website and my audience. Thankfully, my ever-reliable, ever-supportive, and ever-kind little brother (who’s ironically taller than me) helped me resolve the issue. Hopefully, we’ve successfully removed the malware on the website last night. Also, I took necessary precautions on my web browsers (Chrome and Safari). If you notice anything fishy, please do inform me via my Twitter account or email.

Second, I had to rethink some of my business strategies like how to do social media marketing. It really pains me whenever I think about not posting the spiritual fuel daily on my personal Facebook page because I want to share God’s word to all my friends everyday. But, I really think I should stop posting it on my personal page because some friends told me I’m spamming their news feeds. Even I get that impression of myself.

So, if you wish to continue receiving your spiritual fuel, please do join our mailing list (I promise never to spam you or give your email to spammers; I also guarantee 100% that my emails are malware-free). I may post something entirely different, but more suitable for Facebook, on Rocket Entrepreneur’s Facebook page starting on December. So, please do like us on Facebook as well.

Finally, I’m beginning to doubt myself, my abilities, and my dreams…again. I don’t know why. My site’s being hijacked added to my doubts as well. I’m losing so much confidence in myself and my dreams, which I know shouldn’t be the case if my objective is to encourage other people. Also, I’m punishing myself because I serve God, yet I easily get discouraged. ‘di ba, pag na kay Lord ka, dapat malakas at matapang ka? Dapat ‘di ba, malakas ang tiwala? (When you’re in the Lord, shouldn’t you be strong and courageous? Shouldn’t your faith be unwavering?)

But, God really meets us where we are. God knows I’m struggling today, that’s why He tells me to keep the faith — in myself, in my dreams, and in Him. He tells me to go for my faith has saved me. I realized that He allowed my website to be hijacked in order for me to learn how to protect it from future attacks. He made me struggle in marketing so that I would think more about how to market my business. He let me experience hardships so that I would return to Him… so He could make me even stronger and more trusting.

Also, I kept on giving and giving and giving for the past few months. I really learned how to give — my time, talent, and treasure. God has really taught me how to give my all. But, for the past few weeks, I’ve really been feeling empty. I really feel like I have nothing to give anymore. That’s why yesterday, for the first time, I really had no valid excuse for not sending you your spiritual fuel. (That’s why I also feel guilty for not being able to help the typhoon victims as much as I wanted to and needed to.)

Maybe God wants me to learn to take care of myself as well. Maybe God wants me to learn to appreciate who I am. Maybe God wants me to learn to love and respect myself, despite my flaws, shortcomings, and failures. Maybe God wants me to come to Him so He could refill my love tank (credit to Bro. Bo for this concept).

Friend, take care of yourself as well. Fill your love tank. You just cannot give what you do not have. (So that’s why I couldn’t give you any encouragement. Don’t worry, I’ll recharge.)

God is with you and He is filling you.

 

Praying for your takeoff,

Carlo

 

PS. Friend, honestly, I’ve also been struggling because I don’t have much to give to the typhoon victims anymore. I know that I’ve already helped. But I also know I haven’t helped much. Am I being defensive for not helping much? I don’t know. Maybe. That’s also one of the reasons why I was down in the dumps last weekend. Everyone seems to be helping, while I don’t have anything, not even my time, to give to them. I just felt like I have nothing more to give. So, please join me as I pray for them. It’s the only thing I can do for them right now. Who knows? Maybe someday, I can give them so much more than what I can give them now, especially when they are already rebuilding. That’s the only thing I’m looking forward to right now — believing that I can still help someday.

PS2. I’m really sorry for not being able to send you your spiritual fuel yesterday. Maybe in the following weeks, I will not be able to send your spiritual fuel regularly. Don’t worry. I’ll really try to do so. I just need to sort some things out. I really need to fill my own love tank so I can give again.

Photo Credit: Sandeep


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